What Kind of Establishment IS this?

That's exactly what I was saying when I walked into this new chiropractic office with Heather.

Ok, ok. So I guess I should preface it by saying that Danny, Heather's boyfriend is the one who found this chiropractor - through a friend of theirs who is no longer a practicing chiropractor. So that being said, Danny went for his first visit. Of course since Danny has the connections (and because he is outgoing) the chiropractor feels comfortable enough to reveal that he walked into the massage room where one of his employees was...well how shall I say it...providing a service that is typically not provided by this particular type of establishment...she was...providing "oral satisfaction" on one of her male clients rather than a massage. (Well, I guess it is a massage of sorts). And in case I am still unclear, or you are not GETTING the message...this particular massuse was, as Michael Chapman put it "pulling a Monica" (aka. P.A.M.) *Monica as in Lewinski and not the Monica from friends.* Now I fear that I may get some male blog readers asking for the address of this particular chiropractor...remember, this massuse is NO LONGER WITH THE COMPANY.

Of course, being armed with this kind of information, it just set the tone for the whole adventure. Of course, it did help that I was going with Heather, who mind you, fell out of bed in the morning. That's right...you heard me...she FELL OUT OF BED, and bruised her back. hehe. WHO does that? Yes, Heather was a bit out of sorts today.

When we got to the chiropractor, we had to fill out the necessary paperwork. Heather, being who she is put her birthday down as 2008, and of course was called out on it by the office staff. We had a good laugh over that one. I think the funniest part was when she cheated or copied off of my paper when it came to putting your pain threshold. I felt like I was back in elementary school and someone was cheating off my paper. She whispers to me..."what did you put for your pain level right now". I whispered back "7...what did you put". She said. "I just copied off your paper". :)

So as we are filling out the paperwork, I hear the chiropractor come over to this lady, put his hand on her lower back to help guide her and say "Come with me to the water bed". I, of course start laughing (remember the pre-story from Danny), and say to Heather "I thought I just heard him ask her to go to a water bed with him". She said, "I think he did".

Then it was OUR turn. They take both of us together into the back room. I told Heather it was because they were embarassed of us, and thought we were trouble. After some chatting with the chiropractor, where Heather assures him that SHE is Danny's one and only girlfriend, we take our X-rays. He has us do these crazy poses, like the I-DREAM-OF-JEANNIE pose, and of course the full body X-ray in which he asks us to open our mouth wide (again, please think of the pre-story here for why I found this quite amusing). Of course, I HAD to ask why we needed to open our mouths wide for an X-ray. He told me it engaged the top two vertebrae. (uh huh - this is the part I look over at Heather and we start laughing).

After the X-rays they take us into what I thought were two separate rooms, but really are two doors into the same room, where there is a half wall separating water beds. They hand Heather some ear muffs that look like she's going to go to the shooting range. She then lays down on the bed, and the water bed starts. I was surprised at how loud it was...hence the ear protection. I get the same ear muff things, and lay down for my water bed massage. Heather and I keep peeking over the half wall, or putting our hands over to say hi. I feel like a TOTAL dweeb as I am extremely ticklish, and anything lower than my thighs would set me into a fit of laughter. The water bed room is RIGHT by the front desk. Remember, I am wearing these ear protectors, so I don't know how loud I am being, but I went from giggling and laughing like a school girl when the water went from my ankles to my thighs, to LOVING it when it hit my lower back and upper shoulders and neck. You know the office staff thought I was a total reject. The water bed thing was an interesting experience. Of course, Heather was wincing when the water hit her back - remember she bruised it FALLING OUT OF BED! :P

Anyway, I just kept thinking what kind of establishment IS this because of the comments made by the chiropractor, the pre-story story and the crazy X-ray moves. It was a unique experience, and I really enjoyed the water massage when I finally got used to it (and could contain the giggles). We made another appointment next week. I can't wait! We get to see the massuse...get your mind out of the gutter :P