Bed Rest No Longer

Be careful what you wish for. I complained so much about being forced on bed rest, I got some reprieve. Just not in the form that I was hoping for. The past few days have been rough for me. I have been cramping a lot and bleeding as well. I went into the doctor's office today and they did an ultrasound and confirmed that I lost the baby. It was heartbreaking...still is. It happened to be the one time that Dave was unable to make the appointment (he has made all of the others, and every single one of Caiden's - when I was pregnant with Caiden). So not only did I have to deal with the news alone, but then they were testing out a new DVD machine that they got, so they used me as the first patient, so the whole thing was recorded. Fun.

Anyways, I am probably not going to post much the next few days. Just will stay home and be a hermit with my family. I keep trying to tell myself that this was not in God's plan for me right now. I know that mentally, it's the rest that is a bit tough. The doctor told me that I will be depressed for a while, but I am hoping to prove her wrong. Who knows...I feel nothing one minute, and am reduced to a puddle on the floor, crying my eyes out the next. I guess I am a basketcase, but trying hard not to be. Work will help when I go back, but I need a few days off of that too. Then I can consume my mind with all things Wireless until I can figure this out.

Thank all of you for your prayers and support. I cannot express how much that means to me, and how much I appreciate it. Hopefully, God's plan for me does include another child, as I want nothing more. Thank you again. I will write again, when I feel a bit more like myself.