A Black Thumb That YEARNS To Be Green

I have a black thumb. I kill any kind of plant that I buy and put at my house. Only the strong survive, and frankly I haven't found anything strong enough to handle me.

The kinds of plants that I think would be able to survive my particular kind of love are like cactus or something ugly and horrible. You see, I don't intentionally try to kill the plants. I do try to take care of them, but I end up over watering, or under watering, or they get some kind of fungus. SOMETHING always goes wrong. The problem? I actually like pretty plants and flowers. I just get discouraged when I kill them. It's disheartening.

Ok, so here's the story. I have been wanting to have potted plant outside of our door, but for obvious reasons have procrastinated in getting one. Well, THIS time would be different. THIS time I brought reinforcements...in the form of my friend Katie. Katie KNOWS how to plant. Things survive at her house and dare I say they even flourish. Katie is the one who told me what to buy to make my grass green. It worked!! I didn't kill that, so I thought this would be a good idea.

We journeyed out to Home Depot and went the plant section. We scour home depot's garden center for a pot that is just right - and by just right I mean reasonably priced (because I'm cheap)and cute (because I care). We FINALLY found one...half the battle won...now we need to find the plants.

Of course all of the plants I pick would not work for me, but we finally settle on Rosemary (which apparently smells really good - but I had a cold so I couldn't smell it); and these things that look like daisies, but the garden expert ASSURED me that they are NOT daisies.
This is my Rosemary Plant. You know I was told I can actually cook with this as well.

Well, I ask stupid questions about plant care which I swear were about to make the person laugh, but hey I kill things, I need the answers. I ask questions like. "Ok, so I buy the plants...now what do I do?" This boggles the garden expert. I then ask if they will pot the plants for me, so I don't have to worry about that part of the care process. She says yes and we move on.

I try to explain how I am a murderer, and then she understands. She said you buy this kind of plant mix and then you water it. HOLD IT RIGHT THERE!!! That is where I kill things - HOW MUCH do you water.

Her answer: That depends. Well, really? How does that help me. She tells me all of these factors "wind, heat, etc...". Whatever. I see where this is going and I feel badly for the plants that I am about to purchase. Her only advice. "Keep the receipt in case you kill them because you can bring them back".

I then go to the person who is going to pot my plant, however they inform me that they cannot help me because the pot I purchased does not have plugs. Plugs? Why does a pot need plugs? No one told me I needed to look for a cute, inexpensive pot with plugs. They then tell me that I need to drill holes in the bottom of the plant. At this time, Katie mentions something getting mesh or something. Now I am thoroughly confused and wishing that I didn't start this whole darn project.

We buy the pot and plant and go to my sister's house again. I ask her for a drill. She clearly sees the frustration on my face and expertly starts drilling holes in the bottom of the pot. Stephanie starts to pot my plant, but Katie tries to teach me. She tells me to caress the plant's roots...good thing she said that I was going to crush them apart. I thought they needed that, now I know differently.
Steph expertly drills holes for water
And begins to plant
I know it looks like Steph is doing it ALL, but I swear I am trying to be useful
This is me being useful
I'm sure she is fixing my attempt at being useful, hence the turned back so she doesn't hurt my feelings

Anyway, I try to make myself useful and help. As you can see from the pictures I look thoroughly confused and frankly I look a little like I'm in pain. Not sure what that is about.

Me trying to be useful again. Notice the confused look on my face
I still look confused and a little pained
Furrowed brow intact
Still trying to figure it out
This is the point that I realize Katie is taking pictures, so I smile
Caiden reviews our work and approves!

Eventually the plant gets potted, and Katie drives home with me to water the plant (she stayed the night too) and make sure that it has the best chance of survival.
A reward for a job well done!

I have to say I hate to take a picture of it right now. It looks a little sad. Katie said it probably is in shock...as I would be if she yanked me from my home and shoved me into a new place. I hope she's right. I just don't know what I'll do if this plant doesn't survive. :(